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A Bali 'calling' to discover what was missing

My 5-day Bali immersion was a beautiful combination of the tangible and intangible; the spiritual and the practical; the past reflection and the new horizon.

What at first seemed 'woo woo' was the secret to connection, freedom and purpose. Like me, I dare you to 'get out there' and 'out of your own way' and discover the truth to a fulfilling and joyful life.

Not for the faint hearted. If you want the truth, a rollercoaster of emotions, experiences and eureka a-hah moments a-waits for that illusive ‘more’ we crave.

Before coming to Bali something was missing. I felt there was more for me, a desire to make the most of this life offered to me and make a difference. To do more, be more. I felt tethered, held back, constrained. Something felt off, something was calling me, but I couldn't grasp what.

I wasn't a novice to this inward journey. I have been on a spiritual rediscovery for some time now. But it was time to go deeper, to take it to another level; to identify this 'calling'.

In Bali, it's like I found the portal, literally, to life's ecstasy, to unconditional self acceptance free of the sacks full of shame, guilt, suffocation and labels I unconsciously controlled and constrained myself with. I set myself free from a box I didn't even know I had put myself in because it was comfortable and I was successful in it. It was my subconscious compass for decisions and actions.

Whoa did I experience some amazing insights!

A 5 day one-on-one intensive retreat with customised coaching, experiential breath work, meditation, Balinese healings, energetic connections beyond this 3D world, soulful readings and a cosmos aligned fire ceremony; resparked a crystal clear aliveness within, and a clarity of my unique offerings. I found a go-to method around making decisions that are best for me, released my old stories and embodied a new horizon that I am now excited to live.

I discovered it’s not an external reflection to do more or change who I am. It's an internal freedom from dialogue, confusion, and self-imposed conditional love. Its being empowered to make choices that reflect the unique blend that is ME and how to live ON purpose.

But I wasn’t expecting the crash when I got home.

Jumping back into my daily life, I suddenly felt numb where I used to feel joy. It was becoming painfully clear where I wasn’t inspired anymore now that I had uncovered my truth. As a result my foot-hold on life was starting to crumble away. I got sick and found it difficult to maintain vibrancy and energy. It was as if I was being forced to stop and re-examine my life with my new guiding compass.

So I stopped, tuned in with the tools I gained in Bali and the signs and answers received were consistent. I am being driven to all sorts of exciting new areas to expand my natural abilities and interests in healing and spiritual teaching And I am submitting to the concept of allowing my purpose to be my work, rather than the struggle of work achievement perse’.

The journey is not complete, but I am on a new level of understanding and appreciation. The vision is awakening. There is more, I am more. And there is so much more to come!

Deep Gratitude to my teachers on this journey, Dianne Tharp for a perfectly tailored spiritual immersion retreat sent from Heaven. To Durgaji Nik Starr for an empowering energetic consciousness awakening; for Paula Shaw for your insight and reading into my continuum of past, present and future and to the Balinese Healers who's spirit embodiment released some deep blocks and beliefs. I will be back, Bali! My spiritual home.

Photos courtesy of Andrea Glazier.

Jen is a Healer and Spiritual teacher practicing in Meditation, Sound and Movement. She offers group classes as well as one-on-one introductory or deep dive sessions. For more information send an email to or book in for a free 30 min Skype session to discuss how Jen can help you on your 'rediscovery of self' journey.

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